Aligning my expectations with reality wasn't easy- 1

 "You are glowing it's a baby girl for sure", they said. And I was totally elated.

It was my second pregnancy, I wanted a daughter. Even for the first time, I wished to deliver a daughter. But God had his own plans.


This time around, all the symptoms they said were favourable, as in, clues, pointing towards having a baby girl. When you glow it's a girl. When you are working till the last month energetically, it's a girl (Well, I was working equally vigorously during my first pregnancy. When you are the only lady in the house, you have to). It's a girl when you crave certain foodstuff, it's a girl when you've a severe morning sickness (which I had during my first pregnancy too).


My expectations of having a baby girl were elevated so much so, that, I had made a list of only girl names. Didn't even bother to look for a single boy name.


All said and done, with high spirits, I entered the hospital premises. I got admitted the night before.The baby was ready, said my gynaecologist Maasi, my mom's friend, who, under no circumstances, not-in-the-least, gave me even a dainty hint of the sex of the baby. Neither for the first time nor this time. I know they've to follow their protocol and I don't reproach her for that.




But my anxiety was increasing every moment now.


There were no labour pains as yet, so I was induced, for artificial pain, at night.  Mr. Hubby was called and he was to reach next morning. For the first delivery, he was already with me. But this time my mom had to handle it solely.

That night was an endless one. I couldn't sleep, neither my mom, who was with me every second. I knew how it's going to be, from the first hand experience. So the anticipation wasn't ambiguous. I knew exactly what to expect, but the pain wasn't there. We waited the whole night.


Next morning, by 9 a.m., I got my labour pains. I was taken to the labour room. Maasi had stepped out for her vegetable shopping. She had her hospital and home in the same building. Her husband who is a surgeon too, was there with me. He said, "You already know the process, so just follow the steps, breathe and push". 

I did exactly the same. But with each push, I was chanting 'Shree Ram'. And with the final push I heard the cry.


Doctor said "Your chanting worked. It's Ram himself here!".....And my expectations couldn't meet the reality. Should I be happy that I delivered a normal baby who was healthy and hearty, or should I sulk for it's not a girl?


My face dropped then and there. Maasi came rushing in, when she heard I had already delivered. Looking at my face, she thought I was feeling unwell. I also vomited, due to acidity caused by staying up all night. She was a bit worried and asked me if I was feeling better. I told her that I wanted a daughter and she facepalmed herself. "Take a third chance", she said jokingly, right there in the Labour room, where I was still recovering from the fresh delivery and the woe of not delivering a baby girl. Are you serious? I wanted to ask but didn't have the energy. And would you guarantee that it would be a daughter the third time? Would've been the following question.




She cheered me up by handing over my little one who was fast asleep already, not knowing what's happening around him and his mother.


The instance I held him, I forgot all the regret.


'If you align expectations with reality, you will never be disappointed' ~ Terell Owens.


And I tried to do the same, wasn't easy though!


AUTHOR'S NOTE : My true story for the series 'Expectations Vs Reality'. Hope you enjoyed reading. 

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